Dealing with Post-Launch Grief & Acceptance: 2 Lessons I Learned about Creativity
exploring why we feel sad after completing a big release.
After every big project I finish, I get really excited, I celebrate, I take a big deep sigh… and then I start to suddenly feel kinda depressed. It’s a strange feeling to have after working really hard on something I felt super passionate about, and then start to feel sad after it is completed.
Has this happened to you?
At the beginning, there’s tons of excitement!
Lots of energy going!
getting all the research done,
marketing designed,
code shipped,
communications sent,
deadlines met,
Launches & Releases Ahoy!
All things now deployed!
🎉 🎉 🎉
Celebrations! for all the things satisfied!
yet the day after… or even moments later
… a sense of relief 😮💨
“the big thing is done.”
…and then a wave of calm washes over me.
…and then nothing.
😮
and from nothing…
a bit of sadness.
🙁
what is that sadness about?
I just finished a great big thing!
why am i now sad about it?
I celebrated, and there are new things to conquer now.
…but i am sad.
it’s grief.
…and it is a natural occurrence in the creation process.
2 Lessons I Learned about Creativity is about this feeling of grief:
embrace endings
It’s true that even all good things must come to an end.
even when it is ending before truly beginning.
…sometimes we have to kill our own ideas for a variety of reasons.
maybe we didn’t have enough money or resources.
maybe the idea was too complex
maybe simplifying the idea changed it completely!
sometimes a pivot is the best thing to do!
…and sometimes that pivot is to just stop all together!
i know it might seem strange, but sometimes
embracing an ending, is actually a good thing!
quick storytime ^_^
Back when I worked in retail and customer service… some days felt so incredibly long and rife with tough conversations and abuse from customers.
Being exposed to hardships day after day can really take a toll on one’s mental capacity and well being. Especially if there are other hardships to deal with as well, like: commuting to-from work/school, saving for rent & bills, getting enough nutrition, etc, etc…
Having to
work a tough job,
manage relationships,
hustle to make ends meet,
while pursuing your passion projects,
… all on top of taking care of yourself is a lot for the average human to deal with!
I even had to help coach my newer teammates on how to manage getting through the tough days as well. The advice I would share with them was:
at some point of the day…
…the store had to close.
The day would end.
Whatever I was experiencing… would have an ending,
and that ending could give me a moment to rest, and find a new path to move forward.
endings could be an opportunity for relief!
That advice helped me, and many others, persevere onward!
HOT TIP: 🌙
Remember that ALL THINGS must come to an end.
How you choose to live your life until that moment arrives is totally up to you.
If you are working on solving a tough problem in school or in research, just know that there are so many hours in the day… and so, the day will end.
There are only so many days in a semester or business quarter… so, just do your best within the days remaining… Reset Expectations if you need to!
Also, just because one phase ends, doesn’t mean you also have to quit what you are doing. You can just embrace the current ending, take time to rest & reflect on all that occurred, and think about what you would like to do next.
Endings are a portal for new things to begin…
So, I believe the best thing we can do is to just embrace it and…
find acceptance
I always look to nature for lessons in life when I have unanswered questions. For dealing with endings… I think about the life cycle of a plant, flower, or tree.
There are seasons to its life cycle. After the bloom of spring, the brightness of summer, and the change of leaves in autumn… there’s winter.
After the leaves fall away, the tree, barren and empty… there is now room to breathe.
You can see very clearly
… the growth that was made over the year.
…the branches, how far they now reach.
…the trunk’s base foundation, strong & sturdy.
With clarity, creates a path for acceptance.
HOT TIP 🌱
Acceptance happens after you choose to see things as they are in the moment.
However, the reality that you see, doesn’t mean anything, other than what you add meaning to it.
In other words…
It’s just information.
You can now make a choice how to move forward from here.
Although, some things are really heart-breaking to accept:
Like a death of a loved one.
A loss of job, home or item great importance.
A change with long lasting impact.
When we find acceptance, it’s because we find a way to move forward within this new found clarity.
That “way to move forward” can be just 1-step forward, like :
getting out of bed or going outside finally
calling a friend to talk about it
cleaning up after an event
putting away items from a recently ended project.
clearing the page, and starting over again
Performing a retrospective on a completed project, is what some teams do to share in healing through this grieving process.
It’s the opportunity to:
share what we learned;
learn what worked & what didn’t work;
consider what could be better for next time;
ask and answer questions to bring clarity to what happened.
If you are just working on a solo project, a retrospective can look like journaling or sharing a video/blog on what you learned.
It doesn’t have to be public either.
It can be private, just for you.
The benefit of this activity is to help you transmute the energy you generated from the beginning of creation — to having a safe landing at the end of your creation process.
It’s how we create closure.
embracing endings is part of the creation process.
finding acceptance in our endings, is part of the creation process.
self-inquiry check-in:
what are some things you recently ended?
share in the comments!
Final thoughts…
Here are 2 examples of the creation process with beginning and ending cycles:
example 1:
Just think about how mothers-to-be create a baby human inside them for up-to 9-months, and then the baby is released… and the pregnancy ends.
All the processes that contributed to the development of the baby will cease to exist from its designed purpose.
There is a natural grieving period for all the now-defunct cells and energies that developed, nurtured, and delivered what it created.
Even if the pregnancy did not complete the full cycle, it still reaches an end to its process. And so… there is grieving for the ending, no matter what stage it ended at.
This is what contributes to Post-Partum Depression.
example 2:
Even in Business.
A idea is created,
it gets developed into a thing,
that thing is nurtured into a full business.
It grows and grows!
sometimes it is wildly successful after a launch!
…and sometimes a change or pivot is needed.
with changes & pivots,
…sometimes it doesn’t turn out the way it was expected to in the beginning.
sometimes, it is sold, and taken over by another business owner(s).
sometimes, it completes its intended life cycle for a holiday season.
sometimes, it ends abruptly for reasons beyond our control.
All who contributed to a business that ends, will experience grief in that ending.
Even if the ending was happy or bittersweet, or gut-wrenchingly painful — there is an ending to embrace, and an acceptance of the events, so that we can find a path forward.
Endings may be hard to embrace & accept… just remember that in nature, life moves in cycles… and with every cycle, there are seasons that continue forward, even if you don’t feel ready to move with it.
After Winter is Spring again.
Spring is a time of renewal and for new growth to bloom again.
The ending of one cycle, is the beginning of another.
You can bloom again.
I hope this helps!